Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The evaluation of me

"Not only is women's work never done, the definition keeps changing."~Bill Copeland

I'm a work in progress. I don't mean that in the physical sense. I'm just a girl. See, I have flaws like everyone and change has to come to better yourself, if need be. I think throughout the years we evolve as women, it's only natural. We go through hurts and gain wisdom. We go through sadness and find joy. We are constantly growing into who we are meant to be. 

As we change emotionally and mentally, we also change physically. Our bodies change. We get skinnier, fatter, our skin changes, as does our hair. Our features change yearly, more womanly as each passing spring. It's the natural evaluation into womanhood. 

Since I started blogging three years ago I've changed. When I first started blogging I was 9 months pregnant with my 2nd son. I was fat (ok, pregnant) and tired. I had a 16 month old and had no time to pamper myself. Looking back from then to now, I've changed, big time. People can say I've had every plastic surgery under the sun until they are blue in the face, but it's not true. I've learned and grown beauty wise. My skincare has changed, my make up has changed, my hair has changed. I've learned so much from this community and educated myself on products.

One of my biggest pet peeves is when people write up that I've had this or that done as if it's the truth and they know it. One of the biggest things is my nose. It goes back to learning. I've learned what angles work and which don't. You will never see me take a picture from my right side or straight on. The left side of my nose does have that "plastic surgery" look as they say because it's straight and thin but my right side... oh goodness no. It was broken and pushed more to the left. I'm not opposed to fixing it and if/when I do, I'm not ashamed! :)

One of the biggest changes is my teeth. I was gifted 10 upper veneers through a pageant I did. It was such a dream come true. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever thought I'd be given something as awesome as this. I think the vote is 50/50... some people like them and some people think I look like Mr. Ed. I'm not bothered. I like them. It's a HUGE difference from where I started. It takes getting used to, I'm not going to lie, but when I look at old pictures, I feel peace. That's all that matters in my soul. 

The most important changes you can make are from within. I am constantly trying to figure myself out. I'm one complex, cookie. One of my favorite things to do is take personality tests and analyze who I am more and reflect on that and give myself a break once in a while. One of my favorite tests is a letter system by Myers-Briggs. I've had 5 people (including myself) take this test and everyone's results are spot on. It's very eye opening. I'm a ISFJ. :) 
20 years old in Guatemala

So, anyhow, props to you if you made it through all that mumbo-jumbo. I just wanted to write to everyone that most importantly, find peace within yourself. Be ok with you but at the same time, it's ok to change, too. Be ok with the core of who you are and if something bothers you, fix it. If you are struggling with skin issues, be proactive to change it. Try things until something works. If you feel washed out and drab, experiment with fun hair colors. Change isn't always a bad thing. Change can be growing into who you want to be and it can be freeing. 

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.

Anatole France

Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.

Arnold Bennett

If we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow, we aren't really living.
Gail Sheehy



A Lauren to Herself said...

You look stunning. Don't listen to those who say you've had surgery, they're just envious. I've changed too since I started blogging (also 3 years ago) and I think, unfortunately, the blogging community has changed also - and people are not always as friendly as they used to be xx

Sarah Bella said...

Thanks, babe. You are very sweet. I agree, things have shifted over the past few years. It can be hard. I still love blogging though!

Trendydolap said...

that's a very honest writing Sarah. I believe in changes too and I'm always looking for something that I can add to myself.Believe me I'm changing everyday till I started to blogging. As a blogger we have to, I think.

It's so lovely to see people's chance via blogging world.

btw my right side is better than left. So I'm always taking pics from right side:))


A Lauren to Herself said...

Glad you still enjoy it, I always enjoy reading your blog. Keep your chin up and your head held high : ) xx

Makeup Artist Jessica Rivera said...

that's all that matters, is what makes your feel good so I'm happy you know that and practice it. people do it with celebrities too, when they change, the public criticizes them but it doesn't make sense because we ALL change!

allie said...

beautiful picture of you when youre 20. how do you get your teeth so white .. please do tell =)

Sassa7 said...

You dont need to evaluate yourself Sarah or justify why you look the way you look. Those who say mean things to hurt you are tools of the devil and shouldnt matter to you at all. "For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." :)
P.S: I loved the quotations, wise words!

Kimberly said...

Sarah, I just love you! I love your videos and your blog. I think people see an incredibly beautful woman and immediately want to accuse her of having all kinds of plastic surgery. It's silly. I can't tell you how much I enjoy watching your videos. I aslo have 2 young children that are 18 months apart and it can be so hard to take time for yourself. Watching you motivates me!

Mehreen said...

awww. just saw this now. you are beautiful in every way:) i have no idea why people give you a hard time on YT...some of the comments make me shake my head... i guess just insecurities... so happy you are able to rise above all that:)

Nevaeh said...

I cannot judge you since i don't know who you really are.
But you come across as really superficial.
You are very pretty, yes, but unfortunately you do not seem to be well educated.
Maybe you are tyring too hard- make-up and "what's in my bag" isn't worth anything in life.
If you are trying to be more meaningful it still ends up in shallowness.
Of course your inner self is in progress but i think you are heading in the wrong direction.
I mean it's so sad it's almost funny. :-(